by Susan B. Loving
8/11/2010 4:57:00 PM
A mediator is a neutral party who assists people in resolving disputes between them. The mediator does not decide who is right or wrong, or how the dispute should be resolved, but helps the parties decide how to settle it. It is not necessary that the matter involves a legal issue, or that a lawsuit has been filed. However, for some types of mediation, like divorce cases, the courts must still be involved in order to actually grant the divorce, and issue an order reflecting the parties’ agreement.
Benefits of mediation can be tremendous. Mediation is usually much less traumatic than going to court because it is informal and private. It is designed to put the parties at ease. If the parties do not reach a resolution in mediation, their discussions are confidential and cannot be used in court.
While some costs are associated with mediation, it usually costs substantially less than going to court. Normally, parties to a mediation have attorneys with them, to aid in negotiation, advise them of their rights, and the strengths and weaknesses of their positions. Nevertheless, mediation aids in avoiding long court delays and mounting attorney fees.
In mediation, the parties--not a judge--control the result. While in some situations, like divorce, the law limits some decisions parties may make, for the most part they decide what is best for them and their children. The mediator's job is to help the parties communicate, so they can plan their own futures. This leads to greater commitment by the parties to carry out the terms of their agreement which can be especially important in child support and visitation agreements.
Mediation is a healthier way to solve problems. While many people begin a lawsuit by wanting their “day in court,” long, drawn out litigation is not only expensive and time-consuming, but can be very stressful. Particularly in family law matters, divorce or custody disputes can have serious and lasting effects on the parties and their children.
Mediation replaces the negative goal of “winning” through blame and fault-finding with the positive goal of planning how best to move into the future.